juz me!

love u !

2010-09-21T01:55:00.001+08:00

hi. a rare post with pic. my darling n i =)

love u huiyu! =)

a new beginning

2010-08-24T21:19:00.005+08:00

Hi everyone. Welcome to 2010. lol.
ok, since it's the first time since i last blogged like ages ago, i shall share some of the things that happened over the year.

starting from valentine's day. Well, nothing much, just met with a car accident last year, ended up in the hospital, went for ops, 10 days unable to eat. And gained a long and ugly scar, and lost 12over kgs. MC for like 3 months. ya. U didn't read wrongly. It all happened on valentine's day.

Just when i thought i am recovering, i have this irritating skin problem. Called dermographism or something. It's really irritating. Shall not describe it, but , seriously it sucks! N because of this problem, i was like so so so so so worried. Well , some should know what i mean. others may not. But i''m glad, everything is over; i mean the worrying part. not the skin problem. It still persists till today.

And over the years, i had changed my mentality. From being someone super sianz, super hot-tempered, super serious, super hostile, etc. All the bad points. to someone who feels life is so precious. I treasure every min every sec of my time. I really hate to waste time after tat freaky accident. To me, time is precious, life is precious, everything is so precious. I used to mind alot of what people feel and think about me, but who cares now. I'm for who i'm.. Used to let others live my life for me, now, i live my own life.

Furthermore, i gained many close friends through this period. Seriously, alot of which i feel i will be contacting alot in time to come. Through recently i lost two very close buddies as they went overseas, at least i have this bunch of close friends. Well, alan thad shah etc..

----------
And for this 1 year plus, i really need to thank someone.
Someone who is of such importance to me.
From the day we talked, the day we got together,
you are by my side, experiencing everything with me, supporting, motivating, looking after me, everything that a person can do, you did it all.

I know that this one year, i'm really not myself.. I haven't overcome something i called "fear" in me; As well as i'm super hot-tempered because of hatred in me. I just regretted certain things. The flashbacks really made me think alot. What exactly did i do so far in these 21 years. . The disappointments, the mistakes, the regrets. .. . .. ..

I know i'm unreasonable, demanding at times,
I know that i tend to try implant my ideas to your brain.
I know that i'm not a Gd bf, someone who is caring, sweet, concerned, forgiving etc.
What i have to say is that, ever since 18th Aug, after what i declared as a new beginning day in my life, (due to the worries, the hatred etc) my mindset had changed.

In the past, i really demand alot from you, a change etc.
Now, i would want to say, just be yourself, be comfortable, for i love you as you. Nothing more important than this point.
In the past, i really intolerant towards you,
now, i cant guarantee, but, i promise i will change to become someone who is tolerant towards someone i love alot.
In the past, i'm really boring, always staying home (partly because of fear and worries),
now, i promise we will explore places that you wish to go,
go shopping with you for the things you want to buy, anything. As long as i can do it and not against my principles of life.

What i really want is you. The true you.
You, who is comfortable with me,
You, who loves me as well as treats me like a best friend, listening ear, supporting pillar etc.
You, who shares everything with me. I know that i used to get angry, when you share things with me, because i felt you were stubborn when i advised you. But no more. I just want you to share with me, I will not scold.
You, who smiles.
You, who is sweet, as you are.
You, who i love.

Just be yourself, why bother to try when you already stand out.
sorry about everything that i did and said in the past that hurt you; Hope everything will be back to normal, especially myself. Back to my old self, no longer struggling with worries etc. And i hope our relationship will take a step upwards. Into a new stage, our future.

I love you, Lim Huiyu.
Thanks for your patience with me. I'm sure in time to come, your patience will be paid off,
I will try my best, to bring out your smile. =)
No more tears i hope.
Await my sweetness girl..

2009-10-19T23:09:00.002+08:00

well, everything are kind of settled down for me now. Almost back to the old lifestyle, just with an extra scar, an extra fear, that's all.

And i cant wait to start studying. I cant wait to complete my degree. And, I will only drive after Feb 14 2010. It's exactly a year after my accident, giving myself a gd year rest, after which i shall start. I know it wouldnt be easy, but i'm going to try. Everything in the world can be overcomed and i believe i can do it. Not only that, nothing is impossible. Believe it or not, the accident changed a little of my thinking. Last time, i used to have a childish dreaming thinking. Now, being more practical, being slow, as in taking time to consider, to think through. At least, i would say, in a matured way. And the car finally arrived. It's great. Cant wait to drive it, but as i said so, after Feb 14 2010.

Nov 1, is the date i shall get back to my old life. And forgetting all that happened. If you all know what it means. It certainly affects me deeply. But, i'm overcoming it bit by bit each day. And that scared feeling is fading. YEAH!

And i would like to thank my girl.

Yu, thanks for being always by my side. Sharing all emotions with me. Going through all emotions with me. You are great. =) muack you.

haa. my birthday is coming.

Birthday wish:
A Car, for me to drive, after feb 14 2010. And, i'm sure i had become a better driver. I'm sure of it.
Iphone or Itouch, for me to play game. Lol.
Playstation 3
A tv, for my room for me to play playstation 3
A desktop computer

Actually many things. haha. If frens are reading, start thinking of my present. WAHAHAHA.

2009-08-27T19:36:00.002+08:00

for u. Just for u.

Dear. I love u. I will always be sweet to u.
I hope to be around whenever u feel weak, feel lost, feel like crying etc. I always around, lending u my shoulder, consoling u. My promise.

So my dear, pls cheer up. Let me help u. I believe i can help u. Cheer up my love. I believe we can work hard together , down our journey together. N any troubles and problems, we face it and solve it together. Let me be able to cheer u up my girl. ok? =) smile..

love u.

2009-08-19T22:32:00.001+08:00

my silly GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

u super silly. which makes me love u MORE!

HEee. jia you for yr exams. =)

I love u..

Muack

2009-08-17T21:18:00.002+08:00

everyone been asking me.
nic, why are you so relaxed, so carefree, always taking your time, at your own pace. thou in stressful times, workload being heavy etc. why are you always so patient.. etc.....

my ans is simple.
i went through an accident that may had caused me my life. i'm grateful that nothing very serious happened. Thank god. And i told myself, the moment of accident that, i must treasure my life, after seeing flashes of the past at the point of collision, And through this accident, i learnt to treasure my life, enjoy it to the fullest, etc. Also, i admit i had slowed down the pace of my life. To a much much slower pace compared to the past, where, everything must be done instantly, no patience, must immediately. easily stressed etc. I believe i had learnt a very valuable lesson, and that is to listen to my body signs. And you will never go wrong. If your body says, slow down, don't so stress, relax, tired etc. no point forcing. jus follow your body signs. and you are on the correct path.

Also, pple ask me why i dont jaywalk. Simply. I treasure my life. I don't wish to put my life into danger, just for saving seconds or 1 or 2 minutes of my time.

and yes, still loving my silly girl. and still enjoying every min of my life. always smiling, joking etc. i told myself, at the hospital, 90% of the time, i must be happy, mustn't let small things make me unhappy. =)

2009-08-06T22:56:00.001+08:00

something i did when i'm bored. lol............. anyway, dear, check this blog of mine often. =P
will update soon. haha............ happy 7th month in advance.!

2009-08-02T23:48:00.000+08:00

DEAR DEAR DEAR!

I LOVE U !

MUACK MUACK.

=P

1 week to 7th Month.

Nic Love Yu!

2009-07-11T01:09:00.001+08:00

happy 6th month my girl.
no doubt, i'm in love with u.
hope u enjoyed my surprise. =)

2009-06-27T16:05:00.004+08:00

i miss the past...
i'm really tired of the present.
i'm worried about the future.

miss the family warmth. the young days. those fun times, with my sister, playing n playing, with our maid, enjoying ourselves. music blasting, watching tv, watching shows, talking alot, making the home so noisy and fun. i miss those times. especially in secondary sch. the home was so quiet, even could hear the clock ticking away. from having close frens in my sister and maid, to having no close frens. having to find close frens. found them through shanbei. xian hong pang they all. N dad's willingness to me exploring, handing me freedom etc. to the time they treated me like adults. and of course not missing out the sufferings with frens, the fun but hard times with them.

just miss the past. those times with maid, sis, frens, sec days, poly days, post-poly days etc.

a new beginning

2009-06-10T21:18:00.002+08:00

finally. all the troubles and problems are starting to fade.
today i received the tp letter.
finally, the case is over.
the case that brought me sleepless nights, worries.
finally over.
thou at a cost of a fine and demerit points,
i'm still grateful.
thanks lord, for helping me, protecting me, giving me strength.
and of course, thank my deardear, for being the woman behind me, whenever i needed her.
i love u.

For someone special. the one i love.

2009-05-17T00:03:00.007+08:00

happy 4th month. my dear dear.

"Once there was this guy, some say he's super hot tempered, some say he's super nice, someone who have given much hope in love. And on the 13th of sep, fate came along. And so he met this girl, a truly amazing girl, filled with sweetness, super caring, always by his side, supporting him, encouraging him. Thus, attracting him deeply. Of course, naturally he falls deeply in love with her, smsing her daily, trying hard to attract her, trying hard to make her like him, trying hard to hint to her that he had fallen for her. Of course, he was picking out locations for dates, gifts for her, things to do with her. Of course, obstacles came along. And finally, that night at ECP, on the 10th of Jan, he asked her again, and she accepted him. Their journey begins, embarking a future they are looking forward to.

Months had passed. He is still attached to this girl, nothing much have changed, just that now their life includes commitments, expenses, quarrels, problems, obstacles etc. But between all the to-dos and have-tos, there's always time for him to think and to look around him. He looks at his gf, who is still truly amazing. Looking at how they walked their road together so far, and the different directions it had grown. And looking at the commitments, the responsibilities he have now. At first he thinks, well, this is my life. I will live with it. I chose it.

But, when he thinks on more, he realised something. And he said to himself, i'm really one lucky guy, to be able to have her by my side. The ever amazing girl i had known and together with, and always deeply in love with her, with no regrets.."

I love you, lim huiyu.

thanks for every care n concern u gave, thanks for all the support you gave, thanks for all the sweetness u brought into my life, thanks for being willing to walk my difficult times together with me, thanks for choosing me to walk your journey of life with u. thanks for all the happy times u gave me.

you will always be my love, my girl."

nic. 170509

2009-05-11T18:37:00.005+08:00

nic: hey dear..
Huiyu: hey ling
nic: what we celebrating today?
huiyu : our 4th month =D
nic: haa. fast! we still have a long way to go =) years to come right?
huiyu : haha..yup yup.
nic: you know why we still have a long way together?
huiyu : why???is it because we still young?
nic: because we will walk our journey together. and i love u.
huiyu :haha..i love you too.ok,let's go and eat dinner now.ling...i'm hungry.
nic: ok, one last question, if i'm nice and sweet to you, say yes, silly boy. If i'm not, say, no, try harder.
huiyu :yes , my silly boy.i'm hungry.
nic: ok , let's go..

By: nic & huiyu =) happy 4th month.

2009-04-26T01:15:00.001+08:00

i love u i love u i love u
lim huiyu.

2009-04-21T20:21:00.002+08:00

haiz..

2009-04-08T18:36:00.001+08:00

wee u wee.
2 ??????? have been sorted out i guess......

time to sort out and settle the rest. =)
and pray none ??? comes. till den.

i love my sweet girl.

how funny..

2009-04-07T21:25:00.004+08:00

did u feel so angry with someone's attitude, till u feel like telling him/her off, and told urself, you will never have that person's attitude? and soon after, u gave another person that attitude? how miracle can an attitude affect someone...

did u feel so happy, when u see smiles on pple's face? especially it's a super moody and tiring day, and someone gave u a smile... & can u feel the happiness of working class pple, the enthu feeling of them going home, so happy the hectic day is finally over.. smiles all over their face, saying, i'm going home.. how miracle can a smile be...

did u feel sad, everytime u see pple crying, or seeing some sad scenes, or watching super sad shows, or hearing those super sad songs, or thinking of the happy past, remembering the sad past? or is it ur boss scolded u or is it when someone says something hurting, intentionally or unintentionally. Did u feel so sad, till stress even play a part in making you sad. so sad, so stress till you will unknowingly cry, and cry none stop? how miracle can the emotion sad be..

life is full of obstacles. and y must i always have the hardest obstacles of all..
tat day, u just put a full stop to some of my ??
and today, the fullstops, becomes ,,,,,,, and ??? again.
* m i really destined to be alone..... haiz. =(
??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

the life full of ???????????????????????????????????????????????

2009-04-05T22:22:00.004+08:00

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
my mind, occupied by these
?????????????????????????????????????????????????????
?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
so many
??????????????????????????????????????????????????
running in my mind, hoping for answers
????????????????????????????????????????????
??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
so many uncertainties in life
???????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
so many times feeling so insecured
?????????????????????????????????????
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
???????????????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
the life full of
???????????????????????????????????????????????
??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

april 1st.

2009-04-01T00:26:00.002+08:00

ok, let's treat it as a start of this year, if u all get what i mean. Hope everything just goes smoothly for my family, my girl and I.

Finally april arrives. Feb 14 to april 1. 46 days. hope i can forget bout everything tat happened, and move on with my life. My aim very simple.: be healthy once again, be fit, be loving to my girl, to improve my family bondings and enjoy life.

Thanks dear, for always being there when i needed you. Especially those days in the hospital, till the days i discharged, till now. Thanks for being by my side, motivating me, encouraging me, caring for me, loving me, giving me the strength. Thanks for walking down the darkest road of my life with me. In the process, making you so tired. Making trips down to the hospital, my home everyday, guess it really made u exhausted, thus, making u even more tired during ur attachment. I'm sorry, but i promise u wun regret it. I will be a gd bf, always being by ur side, being ur crying shoulder, being ur listening ear, being ur fans, being ur motivation person. Being ur everything, as long as i can be, i will be. =) specially for u. I said before, i wun anyhow say i love you, because i want it, to mean something, everytime i say it. So now, I shall say,
I LOVE YOU, lim huiyu. my dear, my piglet, my darling, my sweetie, my girl. =)
looking forward to making our relationship stronger, understanding u even more, etc. I jus love you so much till words cannot describe. =) hope u can & will feel it.

Now that april has arrived, no choice, but to try to leave the comfort zone of my home, to go out once again, to get rid of the fear, inside me. imagine myself, walking down the streets, siting cars, taxis without fear, it jus excites me. hope the healing physically and mentally has completed.

Wish me luck, all the best, =)

2009-03-25T15:57:00.007+08:00

- - -

if i m someone without memories, and you are the only one i know,
n if i ever leave you, i wont even know where to go.

someone once told me, listen to ur heart, follow your feelings.
and my heart told me this,
you mean a world to me.

- - -

2009-03-25T10:59:00.001+08:00

silly girl...

2009-03-20T00:12:00.000+08:00

徽妤常在我的心

2009-03-17T00:16:00.001+08:00

LOL. special picture.

notice the shape

of our heads..

does it form a heart?

darling, u r simply brillant.

like tat also can notice.

lol

specially for you.

2009-03-16T13:35:00.002+08:00

HEY. Dear. haha........ this post is for you. =)
Dear, did i tell you, how much my life had changed, when you came into my life?
The things we did, the times spent together, WOW. haha =)
And after my accident, i told myself, i'm going to treasure my life, enjoy my life,
together with you. N of course to treasure u..... I realised how important you were when i was in the emergency ward. I knew that your presence meant something to me..
Although there were endless pain, endless vomitting on my side, and endless crying on your side, i hope that through this incident, our relationship has become stronger than before.

As we had discussed before, ok ok, whoever who is in the wrong will apologise first, well, much easier said den right isnt it? Nvm, dear, i shall be the one who apologises first. OK? since i'm much more hot-tempered. Dun worry, i will treasure you, and i meant everything i smsed u that night, the 2k letters sms. LOL....... I really mean it.. trust me and you shall see. =)

Everyday visiting me in the hospital,
was really very touching for me,
was very morale boosting for me.
Even through u could do nothing,
your presence did everything for you.
Thanks for being at my side,
at the most difficult time.

After discharge,
everyday coming my house,
to accompany me,
scared that i will feel bored.
N yet, most of the time spent was on com.
Sorry, i will use lesser when u r here. Promise.
Ya ya ya, promises again. So many promises, none fulfilled yet.
Dun worry, it will all be fulfilled. =) once i recovered......

Thanks for everything you did,
from buying lunch, to accompanying me, to making to happy, to cheering me up etc.
thanks for tickling, when i was moody n sad. =)
thanks thanks thanks thanks thanks.
thanks thanks thanks.

For me to you.
I'm ur listening ear, anything you wish to talk to someone, cry to someone, complain to someone,
anything, u can call me my dear.
I'm ur supportive fan! =)
I'm ur morale boosting.
I'm ur sunshine boy. =)
anything, i can do for you, i will. =)

i treasure you , my dear girl. =)
je t'aime.

2009-03-15T23:28:00.003+08:00

a dessert paradise man. SAW THE CAKES, the desserts? I WAN TO EAT MAN!! haha.

dear dear dear. thanks for all the things u did.
Thanks for accompanying me for the days after i discharged till the start of ur attachment.
thanks for being so sweet, by my side, so caring, so supportive.
thanks alot my dear girl.
I love you. =) although i said i wun say in english "i love u" anymore. haa. =X

2009-03-15T23:27:00.000+08:00

happy birthday to my two best frens.
8 years n still counting.
lucaz n xian.

2009-03-10T14:16:00.003+08:00

happy 2nd month my darling =)

je t'aime.

- i will treasure you. my promise to you. No more crying, i shall not allow it to happen.. only smile on ur face..

=)

2009-03-05T23:46:00.002+08:00

2009-03-04T13:23:00.003+08:00

scare den cry.
moody den cry.
in pain den cry.
accident impact den cry.
cant do anything den cry.
irritated den cry.
cannot go out, helpless den cry.
cannot visit den cry.
not gd enough den cry.
nv woo den cry.
silly den cry.
weak den cry.
feel like crying den cry.
breathless den cry.
touched den cry.
tired den cry.
worried den cry.
sad den cry.

cry, because of so many things.. sorry my darling...

why my darling so silly!!! i always loved u that much, when i first loved u. My feelings didnt change... I'm still darling's. N always will be. I will treasure my darling. especially after the accident. I love you. . . alot...... my darling.. dun be silly. i'm here for u... =) smile ..

2009-03-02T23:22:00.004+08:00

well. 17th day after the accident. I think i had rested well enough, mentally and physically. I realised, i will have lots of friends and family members to thank, when i'm fully recovered... Through the accident, i saw alot of things, well, my really close frens, thanks! my family members, thanks. alot of things, i had learnt to see in a different view. guess, the accident did really scared my wits out of me, and i had matured through it. It may be a blessing in disguise, letting me see many things differently.......

my family.

my dad. thanks alot for doing so much for me. Besides the stress of work, unable to sleep. still have to worry bout me, worry bout everything. And have to get a new car now. And have to work extra harder to get back the money lost. So much trouble caused, and when i said sorry, "dun silly. my son more important. " i felt so touched.

my mum. Sorry for making u so worried that day. sorry for making u cry. seeing u cry, i couldnt bare to let myself cry when i was in a&e, although i was in great pain at that time, i jus didnt want u to cry even more. I tried so hard to hide my expression, the "in pain " expression. Sorry mum. always letting u worry......

my sis. Sorry, even overseas, u have to worry. sorry made you cry. but i'm fine now. I was really scared, tat my life was in danger... but thank god. i'm fine...

my auntie, ee, my entire family.. thanks!!

my dear. Sorry dear. there goes our first v day... cause of my accident. I was quite happy that u werent in the car yet.. If not i will be super guilty. Luckily only me. ONly i was in the car. Only i got injured. Sorry dear for letting u so worried, keep crying.. i will make up for our v day. =) n our 1 month anniversary when i fully recover. Happy 2nd month in advance. I still owe u a meal, a box of chocolate, flowers, valentine cake. =) dun worry. i will remember. Thanks dear for being by my side, when i needed someone the most.. i love u..

sec sch buddies.!
shanbei

zixian , shingchoon, szehong, chialeong, wanshun, aaron, zhonghui, alex. thanks bros.. 8 years of friendship soon =) and still going strong...

classmates, sch mates.

sher n bf, twins, weiqiang weirong, jolene, elaine, jingting, huilin, weiming n gf, jianhui. haiyuan, meiling, weiling. daniel, jasmine, janet, terence, hannah.

ns friends.

ah girl, zhiwen, roy, regan..

church

jessica, bc, esther.. etc.

lots more. in case i miss out. sorry.. =) thanks alot .. =)

2009-02-24T22:16:00.002+08:00

14 feb to 24 feb.
10 days of hospital life. no joke...
the 1st to 3rd day of suffering, the 4th to the 5th, transfering, 6th to 8th , unable to eat even stomach was growling, 8th to 10th, hoping to get out. go home..

well, somehow, i feel, the accident is going to have an impact in my life, not sure how, but it will. I remembered every single bit, of what happened, the scary look of my face, the impact, etc. wished i could forget..... but nevertheless, just got to cope with it..

To many, i'm fortunate , to be here typing my feelings. I was really panicky. Blood dipping n pain all over, the feeling was... anyway, thank u lord, for preserving my life, thank you lord.. it could had been worse, after looking at the vehicle... my car..

N thankfully, huiyu isnt inside, if not i'm really guilty......

And i learnt my lesson, a very unforgettable way. N i doubt i will ever forget what happened..

Just hope for speedy recovery, get me back onto normal human track. Normal way of living. Eat anything, everything, move anywhere. all those freedom. HEAL FASTER! i wan to eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat

EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT.

-hope the impact, wun affect me much..

my love

2009-02-08T16:31:00.011+08:00

Dear, in 2 days times, we are officially together for 1 month. as for unofficially, not sure how many months. lol.. Yes, it may seem short to mean anything, but it has been great, to be with u. You are my perfect , ideal girl. I regretted , why didnt i ask you months ago, to be my gf, when the feelings had developed. I'm just shy, didnt have the courage to do so, didnt know what was ur feelings for me too. But, i'm glad, we are together now, it's never too late. During this 1 month, i realised that you mean alot to me. Ever since you stepped foot into my life, I felt i'm one of the happiest guy around. The sweetness, the gentleness, the caringness, everything.. everything u did.. I can feel the warmth, the love.

By being with you, i finally realised, what is love...

=) well, frens should know, i seldom upload pictures.. since this is special occasion, =)

My dear, the day i saw you, i knew you are the one, the one for me. I knew that i had loved you deeply, and never going to let you go.

And yes, now i know what's love. thanks my dear, huiyu..

I love you, my dear lim huiyu.. my forever silly girl. . .

btw, the hairband u bought for sis. She love it alot..

* dear, i feel really depressed, when i cant be with u when u nid me.. i really hope time files, 2010, i will be with u, every time u nid me. Dear, hope u understand me, forgive me if i'm moody, on sun.. i love u .

*sis, time n time again, everytime, u are back in singapore, i always promised to spend more time with u. and yet , time n time again, that promise didnt fulfil. I really want to let u know that, you are the best sister. I will always remember our time spent together, since young, those stupid things we did, the lame things, those happy times.. ALL THE beautiful memories of us when we were young. I hope that we remain as close as we used to. Take gd care of yourself in australia. That eric better do take care of u... bon voyaye.

i hope 2010 comes faster......

2009-01-24T14:48:00.000+08:00

i miss u alot alot.
my dear girl.

I

2009-01-18T03:36:00.001+08:00

i, want to hug u.
i, want to hold ur hand.
i, want to share my secrets and problems with u.
i, want to be ur listening ear.
i, want to spend time with u.
i, want to make u a happy girl.
i, want to do everything with u.
i, miss u more than anyone else.
i, will treat u like a princess.
i, will protect u.
i, will look after u.
i, want u to be my gf forever..

i, love u.

my darling huiyu..
this is for u. i really really love n miss u only.....

2009-01-11T11:49:00.009+08:00

i came across these poems.
think it's gd for expressing my feelings for u girl. =)

"Sometimes at night, when I look to the sky,
I start thinking of you and then ask myself, why? Why do I love you?
I think and smile,because I know the list could run on for miles.
The sweetness of your voice,
the warmth of your touch,
the little things that make me love you so much.
The way you support me, and help with my emotions,
the way that you care and show such devotion.
The way that your kiss, fills me with desire,
and how you hold me with the warmth of a blazing fire.
The way your eyes shine when you look at me,
The way that I feel when you're by my side,
The dreams that I dream, that all involve you,
the possibilities I see and the things we can do.

You had changed my world with just a short period of time
That is something that I will never deny
You changed me from bad to good, sad to happy
That is why I treasure you my dearest Girl

When I'm with you
your touch chased away all of my fear
You gave me a life that I could live worthwhile

You brought back my faith that almost fade
Now my life is like a dream come true
And it all began when I was loved by you
Now I have found what I am looking for
It's you and your love and nothing more
Co'z you have given me this feeling of contentment
In my life something I've never felt before

I wish I could talk 'til the end of day
But now I'm running out of things to say
So I'll end by the line you already know
"I LOVE YOU" more than what I could show "

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

credits to the authors.

2009-01-04T12:18:00.007+08:00

happy birthday girl...

=) happy advanced birthday wishes to u.. cause tomorrow is a monday. zzz although i really hope to be with u, spending your birthday with u. I hope every year, will be able to spend ur birthday with u. Hope that yesterday's party was what you were looking for and hoped u enjoyed. Actually i'm super shy, haa. cause super paiseh. dunno ur frens will paiseh anot.. Sorry not being to be with u on ur birthday. and I really meant what i wrote in the card. and what i said to you.. really..... believe me ok? have trust with me.. and of course, i finally heard the 3 words. =)

2008-12-31T15:58:00.008+08:00

i'm tired.., seriously i am......
i just wanna a good rest, a long break, some motivation...
to be at my 100% again.
just realised it has been a long time since i was really happy...

it seems that my body is telling me signs,
to be transparent, to ignore others, ignore their words, comments, actions, everything
and just hide in a corner, to take the break it seriously needs......

And my mind is always telling me this sentence,
"give up, it's impossible..."
and my heart is always telling me,
" i got to try.. i cant give up easily. . ."
and my feelings are telling me,
"yes, u are going to be moody, disappointed and sad.."
So i asked a simple question,
where's my emotion happy....
has it disappeared??

guess what's the answer?
my body told me " try giving me the rest needed, i will work as hard as i could"
my mind told me " try convincing me it's possible, i will tell u not to give up"
my heart told me " follow my feelings. follow my body signs, my mindset."
my feelings told me " Put a smile in everything u do, emotion happy will be back.."

and u will be happy again.

understand? chim right? haa. i also think so...

sher sher sher, when u see this, tell loke, i really think he's a great person.. haha. ok?
when i read sherly blog, i really hoped i could be what loke is..
just to recap, my first impression of him, was a great one.. He is such a sociable person. I just feel happy for her, having such a nice bf. =) remain together and happy always..

and of course, i really hope that i could understand u, my dear girl, the way loke understands sherly..... just by her small movements, he understands what she wants, what she's thinking. I seriously wish i could do to that standard too... give me the time to understand u more, so that i can reach that level. alright?

say i got you..

2008-12-28T17:33:00.009+08:00

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TIRED TIRED TIRED.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
anyway, happy birthday jinyao.
went for his party. Late, i'm sorry.

went out with huiyu.
=)
shall not go into details.

girl, hope that i can help u in everything u do. Hope to be there with u, whatever ur emotions are. I hope we can do everything together. =)

2008-12-25T00:59:00.006+08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS to everyone..

wish everyone a merry christmas.
poly, sec sch, ns, => friends,
and
huiyu.
=)

and sorry girl. sorry i'm not always with u. sorry that i'm always making u bored when we r on the fone, sorry not being able to make u smile when we r out together. SO SO SO MANY Things. sorry sorry sorry. will try my best. ok =)

2008-12-20T01:25:00.005+08:00

EmO EMo eMO eMo Emo. SaD sAD SAd sAd Sad. MoODY MOoDY MOOdY MOODy mOODY. sCARED ScARED SCaRED SCArED SCAReD. ExCITed eXCiTeD eXcItEd EXCItEd ExCiteD. tIred tiRed Tired tirEd tireD. WhINe WHiNE wHInE WHiNe wHInE. SiANZ SIaNZ SIAnZ SIANz sIANZ.

ANYWAY, wish all my mates, a very gd luck. =(

Went out with them, sect 3. Watched movie, ate dinner, went home.
No clarke quay, cause of some reasons, sorry to the rest waiting for us over there.......
=( miss the times we suffered and enjoyed together.....

2008-12-19T15:12:00.002+08:00

3 more days of rest left.
not sure whether to be happy or to be sad.
mon, going in with 32 frens. ya, alot.
but it's such a common place. =(

dun know why i'm so emo.
i think because of some idiots............
i still dun understand why...............

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
nvm........ learn to accept the facts...

stupid sore throat!
go away go away go away.

2008-12-17T16:20:00.003+08:00

JO YEO JEONG
I happened to watch this korean show, when my family was watching, and my mum said she's 30 years old. I couldnt believe. Could u all? She looks so young.. Anyway, the show is super nice, should watch it..

2008-12-15T23:39:00.001+08:00

=(
useless me!!
wish me luck.
haiz
haiz

la la la la la

2008-12-15T00:39:00.006+08:00

4 - 5 days of rest. fatigue reducing. But i guess it will never reduce to zero.. anyway, these 4-5days were spent meeting up with frens, with special pple etc. N N N i finally watched a movie since i graduated from POLY. I was quite happy when i paid for the tickets, people must be thinking, this guy siao, paying money can still be so happy. Although the show wasnt nice, but the company with sec sch best frens were great. And of course, i picked someone up, hee. You are the first girl to sit my car. honoured? haha.

BRAIN OH BRAIN. r u rusty? Not sure why, but last time, i used to be able to memorize things vaguely just by glancing through. So when i did my work, i kind of know the answer roughly, knowing where to find it etc. Today, i started on the essay, hoping to complete it by fri. Dont wonder why so many days, cause i'm an idiot to the topic. haha. Now, i cant even find a creative beginning, i cant find the ways to write out my points. I was quite frustrated today. Imagine staring into the paper for hours, crushing don't know how many papers, with thoughts running through ur mind, and yet you cant start properly. LOL.. But luckily, you smsed me. =) The funniest thing was that, i took a rest, sms, did the essay simultaneously. LOL. lie on the bed for a while, den sms, den did a bit of essay, den sms, den lie on bed . lol. the cycle kept repeating. My sis also laughed at me.! lol........

Slacked at home, repeating the cycle the whole day! and i found out that sunday is always a rainy day. It had been the 5th consecutive sunday that rained. LOL. ya. i actually keep track. And i was sad and happy at the same time today. Only 1 person knows why. =) anyway, jus remember my promise made to u. =)

nic

2008-12-11T00:05:00.002+08:00

pop pop pop lo. haha.
block leave.
shiok shiok

rest n enjoy.
anyway. this post is for someone special.
thanks huiyu, yet again. for being there for me.

2008-12-08T11:27:00.003+08:00

3 more days to graduation.
long awaited.

there were tough times, great times.
alot of memories will never fade.
come to think of it, i'm feeling a little sad now...

buddies, we will always remember the 12 nov night. =)

and of course, i have a special person, i want to thank.
miss huiyu.
thanks for being there to encourage me, talk to me.
and thanks for the motivations. you are the best. =)

and not to forget my sec sch frens, friendship going 8 years and still strong..

lol. this post become a thank you session.
ok, if i miss out any, thanks everyone. lOL. don't complain.

2008-11-30T01:19:00.005+08:00

=( =( =( =( =( =(
first of all, sing early happy birthday song to myself, and 2 other buddies.

happy birthday to us,
happy birthday to us,
happy birthday to us ....
happy birthday to us.

anyway, this year bday is a little different.
not sure whether will i feel emo anot,
but nevertheless, i have 2 buddies,
1st dec - yy
2nd dec - me
3rd dec - fabian.
to celebrate with me.

2 of the many wishes (as usual),
1. be healthy, be safe and sound.
2. gf

=( =( =( =( =( =(

2008-11-29T01:17:00.002+08:00

haiz. this week was a total hell.
I'm feeling weak the entire week,
plus the events, activities, really making me super weak,
feel like i'm going to give up, burst into tears any time.
(of course i didnt . . . . . . . . .)
guess you all will never understand what i mean.
interested to know, ask me bout it.
I have lots to complain complain,.......

"meet struggle and master it, only then you will have the strength enough to overcome all future struggles" thanks to that person who told me this.

anyway, extra day to rest this week,
heard next week too, so, enjoy myself to the fullest.

aiya, jus emo - ing. . . . . . . . . cause of the things happened this week, etc...

2008-11-21T22:28:00.003+08:00

silver silver silver silver silver!! YES YES YES@@ finally!!

haha. only some know what i'm talking about. =)

happy! finally achieved my target. and ya, the accomplishment is there,
the feeling of reaching it, it's great.

anyway, this week was a shag week.
for once, i really felt homesick,
really wanting to go home.
Every single min was like hours,
all i can do is, tell myself, try my best in everything,
push on. endure n endure.
tough times are sometimes really great with frens,
but sometimes, with idiots, the tough times just increases.
if u all get what i mean.

well, this weekend is going to rest weekend for me.
cure my sore throat, slight cough, and the entire blisters on my foot.

and, huiyu! nth i can do, but to jia you for u . ya?
jia you! =)

in addition, UPDATE>> sat 22nov.

played bball, the first in many months,
with a group of frens, that went throught thick and thin with me,
for the past 8 years. great seeing them.
anyway, drove to beach road, ate lots of nice food..........
followed by going to tampines, den serangoon garden...
well, i'm getting more and more steady, "zai" in the driving already. haha.
haappyy..

eh, i'm feeling so much better already..
mon, back to normal self.
=)

---------------------------------------------
anyway, u start to mean alot to me. dont ask me why, u just do.......
---------------------------------------------

2008-11-16T10:29:00.002+08:00

finally the "storm" is over.
but mon starts another "storm" for 3 days.
hope everything goes well,
let me be safe.
and let sat thing be smooth, let me pass it.

anyway, i'm glad i have frens by my side.
huiyu, hong, xian, aaron, leong etc.
thanks for the motivations, encouragements, the company provided.

and ya. yesterday drove the whole day. haha.
ate lots. shiok shiok shiok.
drove to so many places.
in the end, stopped at my fren's chalet, haa. got to know 2 new pple.
well.. yesterday was the first time i drove home alone at the expressway, at midnight.
scary, but it built up my confidence in driving,
and gd news, parents considering to get me a new car for my birthday. haha. =) yeah yeah !

2008-11-08T13:25:00.003+08:00

talk to me

"You talk to me
You speak with me
Don't sink before you rise baby
Don't fade away
You hesitate
You seem to wait
For all the time we had
Feels like a world away
Who's to say, we'll be ok
We will make it through the night
Don't wanna wake up in this state
I just want us both to smile
Cause we're the same
And i know that we'll never change
Look i bought your favourite ice cream
I dont wanna see it melt away
If you walk out now
I don't know if we could be the same
Baby just talk with me
Cause i want you to stay here with me

The memories
The things we did
I locked inside my heart
Where i know i won't forget
And now, who's to say, we'll be ok
We will make it through the night
Don't wanna wake up in this state
I just want us both to smile
Cause we're the same
And I know that we'll never change
look I bought your favorite ice cream
I don't want to see it melt away
If you walk out now
I don't know if we could be the same
Baby just talk with me
Cause I want you to stay here with me
I want you to stay here with me "

anyway, silly girl......... thanks for being there for me. =)

well, been trying to find that mentality, needed for the 6 days.
I really cant convince myself, cannot find that mentality.
hopefully, i'm prepared, let me get through..............
wish me luck.

2008-10-27T00:52:00.002+08:00

"
i used to wonder,
can people just treat me as transparent plastic?
can no one remember my mistakes and stupid things i've done.?
can i just live in my own world?
..........

with u,
it's different.
when you are down, i want to make u happy.
when you are sick, i want to take care of u.
when you are sleepy, cannot sleep, i want to sing lullaby for u.
when you are bored, i want to entertain u.
when you are being bullied, i want to protect u.

when you start to look elsewhere, i want to do things for your attention.
when you start to like me, i'm glad i'm already in love with u.
when you treat me nice, i'm glad i treated you much better already.

........................
"

2008-10-25T17:03:00.000+08:00

a very tough week for me.
very very.......

2008-10-19T10:58:00.002+08:00

yesterday, the first time i drove the car out,
to fetch my frens.
wonderful exp, haha. but a little scary.
haha. long story, for those who sit my car,
muz feel honoured hor. haha.

anyway, hope my sore throat, cough, slight flu recover soon..

and huiyu, gd luck for the exam. jia you. =)

2008-10-12T02:07:00.003+08:00

i'm shag, super tired. haa.
and i have cough, slight flu,
luckily, better today,
left sore throat.

went out with hong today.
haha. eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat.
supper with gene gf, xian hong.
eat eat eat eat eat eat eat eat again.
lol.................................................................................

anyway, haa, thanks to that silly girl. =)
for accompanying me, talk with me, listen to my complains.
haa. time files so much faster.

2008-10-04T15:28:00.003+08:00

BODY ACHE AH........
haha...... complain complain complain. LOL.

anyway, thanks to those gd frens that entertain me. =)
adeline, thanks for ur that post. LOL..... say till like tat, will shy. =)
huiyu, thanks for talking to me =)
and my buddies for ur entertaining jokes, encouragements. =)
lalalalaalalala

anyway, tears roll down my eyes yesterday,
because of the card my sis wrote to me.
the words in it, are filled with memories, the time we used to spend together, the things we used to play, how we used to quarrel etc, filled with alot of meaningful & beautiful memories.
I miss those times, haa. looking forward to her holiday back at sg! =)

well, drove today. haa. my mum was super scared. keep telling me slow down slow down. I was like, for what? haha. dunno if are all mothers the same.? haa.

2008-10-01T15:13:00.002+08:00

well, all is well. haha. coping well. doing well.
hope this continues ........
anyway, ate alot, bought alot during these 2 days of break.
that's all.
n shiok to drive again. haha. this time nothing happen. haha.
shiok shiok shiok.

my current motto: eat train sleep.. =)

1st time driving without instructor..

2008-09-12T01:55:00.005+08:00

OK. i'm hot-tempered. Ok, i'm in the midst of changing. ok? Be patient. Anyway, today slack at home the whole day and did practically nothing. All i did was listen to music, do push ups. Lol, i was that bored. =_=.

at night, my parents said go out eat, and i drove. From hougang to sengkang to serangoon garden to kovan. Sengkang cause multipe storey carpark, i'm not a seasoned driver yet. Serangoon garden, no parking. Kovan finally.

Ok, damm paiseh, because i failed the 5 attempts to park the damm car in the stupid parking lot.

i cant park the damm car, and lots of car waiting for me, super give up, in the end, my dad had to swap place with me, to park.AND AND AND, bloody hell, suddenly i feel all the drivers are crazy,

speeding like crazy, cut lane without signal, and they are selfish. Everyone wun let u cut lane, i was like wth. .. .. . ....

AND great, this car, almost hit me, cause i cut lane, he refuse to give in. AND there's confirm space for me to change lane, and he speed up for f***. DUNNO what is he thinking. Rush to where man. zzz AND Honk so loud, idiot. den he purposely overtake n slow down, revenge and

my turn to honk. =_=

Jus damm pissed with those unresponsible drivers, and inconsiderate ones. super give up with them on the road. zzz guess i'm still a green horn. More to experience, more to learn.

the licence is just the beginning. .. . . . ... . . . .. .. . . .

i suddenly realised, the speed i used to drive, is super slow =_=

2008-09-11T18:17:00.002+08:00

SHIOK AH. haha.
finally..... i'm a qualified driver. lol

well, i pass with 4 demerit points . hee.
damm little right. okok.. lol. i'm zai. lol.......

i damm happy. =)

at the same time, i got to know a girl and 2 other guys. =)

one word, shiok.

2008-09-08T00:39:00.002+08:00

7 days, 1 more week
to the long awaited NS enlistment.
haha. I'm looking forward to it actually.
but, at the same time, nervous and scared.
well, ........

N N N N N N N N N N N N N N N N N N N N N

mon 8th - goin circuit revision, out with sher.
tue 9th - goin circuit revision, emo at home.
wed 10th - car tp exam, if fail, emo. if pass, go play pool, go gene chalet.
thurs 11th - no plans
fri 12th - no plans
sat 13th - goin sentosa, maybe goin aunt penhouse look at the sky, the stars.
sun 14th - mid autumn, emo at home.
mon 15th - enlist.

And i realised, i have very little friends, that's damm sad. But it's great having a few close frens,
of course, are the shanbei pple. Sec sch life, to poly life, to ns life. to forever........ thanks and it's great. As for the rest, there's a few more, like haiyuan etc. thanks bro, and wenxiang, emo trio. lol.

And, i had made a promise to myself. =) tat's sweet. lol. jia you ba nic. =X

2008-09-06T01:23:00.004+08:00

today went to celebrate aaron's birthday.
well. guys, as usual. 9 of us.
8 years friendship, still counting.
watched death race. not bad not bad.
den prata supper.

cut my hair today,
i said botak, but i backed out. cut short instead.
haiz. y m i so useless. lol..

ok. i'm damm sad.
over the few days, not because of anyone,
but because of myself.

haiz...........

and, y do i keep thinking of u? zzz.

2008-09-02T23:58:00.001+08:00

愛不疚

收藏在眼眸
常徘徊左右
爱猜到没有愉快玩笑後
能全然退後
你开心就够这种感觉太亲厚
讲一千句也不够假使讲了你听到後
或会走这种恋爱太罕有
不须真正拥有成全
衷心祝福然後
就放手放手
放开所有
彼此更自由
放手
其实我绝非爱得不够放手
豁出所有
还有这个好友已经
已经足够遥远是宇宙
静静在背後
去看守就够这种感觉太亲厚
讲一千句也不够即使一刹有过冲动
挽你手这种恋爱太罕有不须真正拥有成全
多舍不得仍然
是放手放手
放开所有
彼此更自由放手
其实我绝非爱得不够放手
豁出所有还有这个好友已经
已经足够放手
我的牵挂
找不到尽头放手
期望你幸福甚麽都有也许
爱很深厚
然而我早看得透放手
至可拥有

moody mooody mooooody

2008-09-01T00:55:00.002+08:00

危難裏我會陪著你, 或是如同做戲, 去到最尾會各自飛
this is a super meaningful phase .........

anyway. sat, went to work at sentosa.
eh, with 3 of my secondary school frens, xian hui choon,
and the others from sp i guess.
230 to 11pm for 60$.
it's for siemens 100th anniversary.
Work was busy. Quite slack towards the end.
I wanted to work for the telematch,
but too bad smith couldnt get me to go with him.
Therefore, i ended up at the other section, the food etc section.
Super busy giving out bento sets,
And it really shows the true character of a person,
and i realised that the world are filled with all sorts of people,
from helpful, friendly, reasonable to super unhelpful, rude and unreasonable.

Well, of course the night concert was great.
Fireworks too of course. Superb. too bad no video.
den we packed up the place and collected our pay.
Tired but enjoyable.
Den headed to chomp chomp for supper.
Tat's all

my life now .. .. . . . . .

2008-08-29T01:42:00.002+08:00

ok . emo days to ns.
everyday, wake up, thinking less 1 more day to ns.
i jus feel like slacking all the way.
all i do is , dota, watch dramas, and experiment cooking. =_=
and learn car on some days.

well, heard from someone,
tat she's feeling down,
and i'm wondering, why she doesnt find me,
when she used to.
Maybe that's the end of our close friendship.
If u are reading. =_=.
U can find me if u do have troubles,
i'm serious.

And, another person knew about my blog.
Emo and silly adeline.
o.o cheer up.

AND,
busy man has his schedule done up.
for now,

30th august, working at sentosa, 230-11pm
5th sept, outing with haiyuan they all, planning in progress
6th sept, aaron birthday
8th sept, meet sher,
10 sept, car tp, eugene birthday
12 sept, 4eb class gathering, to be confirmed
13 sept, goin sentosa with wenxiang ling they all.
15 sept, enlist

the other days, are slacking days, resting days, learn car. cya.

2008-08-27T01:01:00.002+08:00

20 days to ns.
one word, super sianz.
the anxiety, the nervousness.
suddenly i realiised that soon,
i'm entering the army.
The thought seems to have frightened me.
And, suddenly, the months of holidays are gone.
How fast can it get................

Well, i'm not hoping for anything.
All i wish is that, for the 20 days, i want to go out to enjoy myself
Who wants to accompany me?
Before i enlist of course...........

And for NS wish,
just let me be safe and sound,
let me become built,
let me be able to cope with the training, everything.
In all, one word, SAFE.

tat's all =(

=(

2008-08-12T00:28:00.002+08:00

sad sad sad sad sad. Ever since saturday, i've been feeling super sad.
Well, let me jus say what i had done for the weekend. Friday, Went chomp chomp meet up with secondary school friends. Well, nice food, i enjoyed myself. I simply love eating. And of course, the company of friends. THEN, i regretted this part. Going to play poker........ Lost sleep, also lost $22. Damm sianz. And wallet with a big hole.

Saturday, went home sleep for a little while, went out with the 2 lings, haiyuan, wenxiang to catch the fireworks. Ok, saw a little only. =( Ok, actually that day, the outing, it was quite ok, just that i'm tired, and lots of people, making me super super duper moody. I hate lots of pple, they have the tendency to step on my life etc. Super pissed. Ok, i admit, i'm a little jealous, ok? for those who went out that day. But, aiya, tired, ultra moody, jealous, what can u expect from me? sorry if i gave attitude.

And, i'm super sad n pple say EMO right now. And i cant find people to talk to... WHY WHY WHY??

2008-08-06T23:46:00.002+08:00

tired. moody. sad. Well, do not ask me why, cause, i'm unsure too. I think it's probably i'm super bored, nothing to do, waiting patiently for ns. Somehow, i have the urge to be fit when i enlist, and somehow, no matter how hard i train, i still cant get fit enough, to the standard i want. All i can say is, try my very best. Hong called me, telling me how tough it is, but with the friends around, things get easy. So, please let me have more friends, to encourage me. & motivate me pls. Also, haiyuan called me, haa. NS! I'm kind of looking forward to it. Hopefully, i will get used to it.

urm, went running, haiz, i can say that my ankle still hurts. Not sure why, but probably i strain it too much before it can get well. I really hope it will get better, so i can do sports! I'm really tired of staying home, doing nothing. All i can do is dota, watch tv, watch dvd and vcd. Lol, well, i had watched every latest show in the cinema, from the rental store. What else can i watch? So, i tuned to the history channel. It is becoming my favourite channel!

And, i freaking realised the importance of having a car! So convenient driving around, not to mention parking of course. Taxi are super difficult to get and expensive, i'm becoming broke cause of the stupid habit of cabbing. zzz......... nothing to say.

And and and, i finally realised who is important to me. Anyway, long time not playing bball, long time not dating, long time not goin to town, long time not goin shopping, and long time not goin out with frens for supper n having nice dinner!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One word, BORING

2008-07-25T01:27:00.000+08:00

waiting.. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..

2008-07-25T01:17:00.002+08:00

Happy 21st birthday Chia Leong!

These pics, the Group of us that celebrated.

Of course hui didnt wan to take.

can't smile without you

2008-07-14T23:57:00.002+08:00

You know I can't smile without you.
I can't smile without you.
I cant' laugh and I can't walk, finding it hard even to talk.

And I feel sad when you're sad.
I feel glad when your glad.
And you must know what I'm going through,
I just can't smile without you.

You came along just like a song,
you brightened my days.
Who'd believe you were part of a dream that always seemed light years away.

And you know I can't smile without you.
I can't smile without you.
And you must know what I'm going through,
I just can't smile without you.

Some people say the happiness way is something that hard to find.
Into the new, leaving the old behind me.

2008-07-13T23:08:00.004+08:00

imagine, 2 days to the long awaited car tp,
which i waited for 2 months,
in all 1 year +,
and i have to miss it,
why? simply because of my sprained ankle.
Why? why did i run to the basket,
why did i lean forward,
why did i even play bball in the first place.
Say me stupid, thanks.

Because of the car tp,
i gave up the australia trip.
I could have enjoyed myself,
could have given myself a break,
i could have, met many aust girls,
i could have gone touring around aust with esther,
in the end?
all but nothing.

nth to say. I'm juz depressed and sad at the moment.

2008-07-09T18:16:00.002+08:00

poker again.
overnight again.
didnt sleep again.
learnt car again.
tp on mon again.

went for a movie, Wanted.
den went to david's bungalow.
Play poker, in between etc.. zzz

The best part was the poker finale,
between lucaz and I.
How great, i got 178$ worth of chips,
he had 26$ worth of chips,
and i lost. =_="'
nth to say.......

tired.. .. . . ... ... ... .....

long wait continues.....haiz...
who ever knows......
2 years... zzz

thoughts

2008-07-06T00:54:00.002+08:00

full of emotions.
happy, sad, moody, vexed, sianz.
why? simply cause of the recent and coming issues.

happy, cause i realised, actually, lots of pple care for me.
sad, simply cause i didnt get hold of chances, thinking back of the past too. =(
moody, cause of some idiot.
vexed, lost..
sianz, car tp approaching. haiz.

injuries.
knee strain, shoulder and thumb sprain.
faster cure pls...

and to that idiot.
sorry we lost,
sorry i tried my best,
sorry there's no teamwork.
and, everything sux. n1

2008-07-02T01:24:00.005+08:00

"somehow, someway,
i just feel like knowing what's happening in ur life,
somehow wanting to contact u.
it seems like a habit.
hoping to see that u r happy,
afterall you are one person i like alot.
hoping to tell u,
how much u mean to me.
pple say that i m dumb, stupid,
but i do not care.
cause i feel its worth it,
waiting for u,
no matter if you have a bf anot.
Hoping one day,
it may touch u...
hearing you love me too."

anyway, update on my life
now, working, mum's office, tuition centre, admin work.
n watching the silver chambers of sorrows, newest tvb drama.. . ..
after watching all the so called newest show le. zzz

lol. poker poker craze.. haa.. addicted to it. =)
sat went to lucaz house for poker,
met at 8pm.
played overnight.
330am went prata,
came back play again till 8am.
8am went breakfast.
10am sleep till 7pm.
den stayed up watched soccer at 245am to 445am.
slept, 10 wake up for car revision.
sat - mon covered....... lol

n..
eh, damm scared,
tp 4th time coming up.
i hope and dont wan to fail again. =(
i hate the feeling.

2008-07-01T00:13:00.002+08:00

sat, bball as usual. haa. it had been a long time since i heard compliments. haa.
anyway, headed to east coast, not a very wise decision thou, the weather is a killer.
anyway, meet qingyan, xiang, yuan, ling there, den headed to parkway.
ling, it's great hearing u gotten over it. if u are reading. . . . .
all i can say is, there are better guys out there. =) and trust me..

2008-06-26T00:56:00.002+08:00

today went out with jol jt hong gene qiang ming elaine lin'er.
ate ajisen ramen, took pic, drank coffee.

well, heard from gene bout the training method.
sianz, he got the mass to train, i got none.
he told me to get weight gainer, its ex n have cons.
zzz. nvm, see how, juz continue to keep fit before army.
at least i'm alot more fitter den i'm in poly.
gd sign.
gd luck to hong for bike tp.
mine 4th tp coming up.

wish me luck. =(

2008-06-20T01:40:00.002+08:00

well, been training for NS recently.
the feeling is like, shiok. Have the urge to train, be fit.
regretted didnt start earlier. =(

anyway, been trying to write a book.
haa. ya ya, everyone is curious.
even i'm curious, why i suddenly want to write one.
well, partly, to see if i'm really interested and want to be a writer,
also, to improve my english while writing.

Ya, i'm so into one tree hill .
season 4 out, i'm watching, addicted. lol.
also, been dota-ing with aaron. its fun!
Not to mention, EURO 2008.
Pls support germany and holland.
Either one. =)

And, my trip to australia is cancelled.
due to clashes with my car tp.
4th time, i really want to pass it !
the faster the better.
So, i gave up the trip, pls let me pass the tp.

In summary, my life recently,
is full of activities.
And, no longer as sianz and lazy as before.
At least, i get myself to leave the house,
to go out walk, be it alone or what.
It seems like a gd idea, meeting frens!
lol. its just so fun! =)

fathers day

2008-06-16T22:18:00.004+08:00

Ok, happy father's day.
Celebrated mine at orchard.
Lets start from the night.
After cutting my hair, headed to crystal jade, full due to the tim sum, ate a little with my parents. Salted egg prawn
beansprout. dunno the name =_=
bamboo clam. my favourite, but, sum hoi sum still the best for it.
3 types of eggs vegetable.

Below are some of the tim sum pics.

chef cooking the food.

Enjoy the food. =)

Singapore sale

2008-06-13T13:28:00.002+08:00

haa. this is damm cool. First singapore sale i shopped with friends,
and all guys. Haa, aaron hong xian david cat lucaz n i. haa..
well, we bought almost from the same shops.
First, all of us bought something from esprit. Applied for member. =)
Headed of to New urban male for my slippers,
den to tangs, FCUK, spent quite alot. broke =(

anyway, saw this mixed blood canadian girl.
i suppose, is studying in singapore.
haa, hoping to see her again. =)

over the weeks.

2008-06-07T00:29:00.003+08:00

eh, one word, tired.
I'm super tired,
even using the com, even playing a bball match, also no strength and energy.
well, guess this is the results of late nights..
erm, life have been quite normal, except for some exceptions............

these few days, watched many shows as usual.
watched korean show "the lobbist", canto "forensic heroes 2" n "the journey called life".
well, as i said always, there's alot to learn from shows.. many meaningful phrases and words..
during my free time, thought about the past,
those things that i had done,
those things that i had been through,
those decisions that i had made,
it's sometimes very interesting and meaningful, to look back, to think back,
making sure u do not make the stupid mistakes ever again,
thinking if those decision made before, will it ever still be the same.
I kind of missed the old life, the way of life.. Every aspect of it.
Those times i had spent with my sis and maid, those were the happiest times..
Liked the house filled with noise, laughter, giggles, chatting, music n tv blasting, companionship.
Missed those home cooked food, my maid cooked the best food ever, nicer den those found in restuarants. I kind of regretted, why didnt i treasure those happy moments..
Now that the house is so quiet, only me, sis overseas at aust, maid at hong kong, me grown up,
it just makes me sad......
But i gained 2 very important things, much maturity and independence.

well, talked about yesterday, we, usual gang almost got trouble with ah bengs, bball match =_=,
solved easily because in the end, those pple came, we knew each other. =_=.
hard lines. . . . .. .

anyway, pple say i'm anti social, hot tempered, zzzzzzzz, pple said i'm more matured..
well, i'm sure that what i had been though, i had changed alot.
I will change in terms of my attitude and hot temperness..

2008-06-01T01:02:00.000+08:00

差一点...

2008-05-31T00:35:00.001+08:00

work today.
easy job, easy cash.
9am reached. Played table soccer all the way to 11.
11 the event started. Our job was being the referee. Shiok rite?
table soccer referee. damm shiok la........ 11-2 only, $50.
Didnt do much. =)

Hong, haiz...... hope u learn ur lesson ba..
$50 is an expensive lesson..........
Ok, he lost his pay.. =(
haiz, sad for him too..
haizzzzzzzzzzz

2008-05-28T01:16:00.003+08:00

Yesterday:
celebrate haiyuan's birthday. upload the photos when i get it. We wanted to give him aa surprise at his home. Eh, it was really a surprise. zz lazy to describe. Yongtheng, meiling, bf, xiang, the two girls. weiling. qingyan went.

Today:

well, photos speak for themselves. The desserts SUX SUX. Look at the beans, so hard, zzzzzz.. And so much water, its like, what the.............................. Hard lines....

Best thing was, when aaron asked for jackfruit cocktail, the uncle said finished. The wife came, said, "take out jackfruit for me", HE TOOK OUT N GAVE TO HER. Hui, aaron and i was like wtf? zzzzzz lamer man........ n $2.50. IMAO

anyway, went dinner at new york new york, $89. =_= den went to play pool. Saw the girl that also went for haiyuan's birthday celebration, but dunno her, so... so we went off to arcade. LOL. we 4 really bo liao =)

Fri:

goin to work .=)

2008-05-26T01:28:00.002+08:00

well. this is meiling's celebration. Celebrated her 21st bday. happy birthday meiling.

Graduation

2008-05-22T23:30:00.007+08:00

Well Graduation 2008, finally graduating from poly.

The feeling was great, graduating together with friends,

entering into the next stage of life together.
3 years, not long, not short, had passed back.

Soon, for us guys, going to army.Time files, i agree with it.
Well, waking up for the graduation ceremony around 6am.

I was like, why did i choose to go for it. But lucky i didnt regret.. =)

Let the pictures do the talking.

Dad and i

Sher and i Me and Liting(fyp DT, Thank u!)

Well, those photos above, are friends, who helped me in Year 3 of the poly life.

Thanks to them, Year 3 was a great experience, Thanks!

Well, Those pictures below are friends who helped me in the 3 years of poly life.

The Benko group, Although no chance to take pictures with them on graduation,

due to some miscommunication i would say...

so, uploading a pic =)

Thanks to all.

2008-05-18T13:16:00.003+08:00

Recently, i'm feeling moody. Many may feel i have no worries but its wrong. I do have worries. My future is one of the greatest worry in my life. I want to be a very successful banker. But can i? Parents told me to start planning, cause they need to plan. Well, I'm starting to realise that my parents are getting older, resources are depleting each day, due to me, and my sister's enormous school fees, but she has a bright future. How about me?

Well, i'm experiencing fatigue recently. Ever felt before, when you are eating halfway, you feel super weak, no energy? The feeling sux. So, i'm starting a sleep all you can program. I'm been taking afternoon naps, sleeping earlier, waking up super late. Hopefully, this can cure my fatigue. Besides, sleep can cure my worries, problems. Probably you may dream of something useful. Ok, whatever.

Happy birthday shun.

2008-05-11T01:26:00.004+08:00

first time blog twice in 1 day.
wish sherly happy birthday. Just came back from her chalet.
Thanks andrew and sufia for the ride home.
sher, Ur bf is a great guy. Treasure him.
a stable career, nice guy, gd social skills etc.
a perfect guy.
so Wish u all, all the best.
happy 21st birthday.

2008-05-10T17:52:00.002+08:00

hello.
start from thurs.
hong drove to my house, watched nba, and watch almost every channel in SCV.
super boring........ so we decided to go to bishan for dinner, since there's car.
went to the hongkong food restaurant or what,
we were like talking about the past, etc..
but, don't know why, there's a girl keep turning and looking at us.
Its kind of irritating... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
probably we ordered alot or talked to loud or talked to much. whatever...

Fri,
eh, had 3 appointments.
One watch movie with xian,
two go out celebrate jol's birthday,
three celebrate jas's birthday.
Managed to rush to novena to celebrate jol's birthday,
then rushed to vivo to wish jas happy birthday.
Except meeting up with xian , ps.

Sat,
cool la.. we played bball as usual.
morning's weather was superb.
Very windy, very cooling, very exciting.
Robert horry aaron pang on form. haha...

ate lunch, continued bball.. zzz.
We played horse. Not sure if u all know what it means..
Very fun. We played 3 rounds. 1 solo, 2 groups.
Enjoyed ourselves. The first time we really went back to our sec sch days, really enjoying...

anyway, happy birthday jas, hawa, jol, soon shun n kellyn. =)

2008-05-08T22:32:00.002+08:00

Tp Exam

fine, i decided to face the fact that i failed my tp exam.
well, practices had been perfect for me, i felt confident like never before. n during the tp exam,
everything was well as i hoped it would be. But here's the horror. I did all the stations perfectly,
n at the last station, something happened. damm. The tester looked at me, asking " 3rd time right?" i replied yes. He wrote something on the paper. I was like, omg. So, i decided to buck up. He tested the E brake, its perfect without flaws. He too said it was good. Went outside road, he said " you are zai cioutside, but your rcuit that station, buay zai." I was like, "i was nervous, but i had warmth up. He said " nervous cant pass de, N he said, your outside road very zai, go back school".. I was kind of happy. BUT, HE TOLD ME I FAILED. o.O Well, this time, i really did explain. But he said no. So accept the fact. The most sad thing was, everyone thought i would pass. Even Uncle was shocked. I'm so .......sorry........ haiz..

Frustration

well, never in my life, i felt so frustrated. Starting to worry about my future. Its getting more and more scary. No uni offers, how great...... Even my mum thinks i am a let down. How great it was. The feeling of frustration starts to mount up.
Since sec 4, the frustration started. And it continues to even now. Well, sorry aaron, for the quarrel. I was just unhappy that u threw the ball hard at me. For that, i was pissed. Whatever..

Friends
I am super glad for the group of friends i know, Shanbei. Hong xian hui aaron shun etcc. let me see, 8 years of friendship and still going. Quarrels do occur, but it makes our friendship bond even stronger den ever.. 2001 - .
Remembering the times, sec 3 & 4,
playing bball together, going early recess together, studying together, so much fun
After the olevel, got the results,
We discussed the courses together, we discussed who wanted to go together and where.
After poly,
We still discussed about the uni.
NOw,,
Waiting enlistment for army together.

Memories at secondary school, an unforgettable experience. Also for the every sat bball.
All i can say is, I am glad i had you all.

2008-04-30T23:26:00.002+08:00

NS letter came.
15 sept. erm, same day as gene.
should be ok ba. at least got a fren.
but, 23 sept my mum's birthday. sad...
will be in camp.
4 more months. enjoy more n to the fullest.

Car tp 3rd time on Mon. 5 May.
pls pls pls . let me pass. i beg u. god and the tester.
been waiting a long time for the licence.
since year 2 of poly. till now graduated. how great. zz
so now, sincerely requesting for my driving licence..
have confidence this time, but still as scared as ever,
i guess i'm just someone who cant cope with pressure...

someone told me,
i m like a frog in a well.. zZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
"3 weeks, u go out walk for 3 times, other than that, you go out eat dinner and come home/buy dinner home."

thanks ah.. ZzzZzz =_=

2008-04-26T01:06:00.000+08:00

STRESS

2008-04-24T23:35:00.002+08:00

now, this is what i'm planning........
after NS, if i cant get into singapore university.. guess i have to study overseas. Ya, n yes, Australia. Actually, this is what's planned for me by my mum since i'm sec 4, anyway. So, it has influenced me, of course, under my sister's persussion, i finally start to feel, studying overseas may have advantages.........

Well, these few days, super duper bored. Not that i want to, but, seriously.. lazy to hunt for a job and i hate to be working alone... rejected all the job offers hiring one person. Well, stupid or what, yes that's me...

well, what's pestering me is the NS intake, plus my car tp exam(3rd time soon). I hope i can pass, get the licence. 2years is enough, time to me to drive! please, let me pass the tp.

2008-04-15T01:01:00.001+08:00

i miss her..
close to knowing you to 2 years.....
sometimes really wish i can say , u still mean alot to me.....

read, n lol.

2008-04-03T00:46:00.002+08:00

2 weeks of drama marathon......
ya, i watched drama for the past 2 weeks.. All sorts of dramas! Taiwanese, Cantonese, Japanese, Korean, English....... Currently, watching a Canto rental show, about detective, n taiwanese drama called dreams link. I will say, damm nice, damm ideal show for girls =_= who like to dream. I recommend girls to watch it.. For me, nth to do, therefore, drama marathon, every show also watch. =X. BUT I SERIOUSLY THINK THE GIRL IS CUTE> =)

Well, i didnt know that by watching dramas, i'm still able to learn some valuable advise and sentences/phrases...

well, i learnt that, there is a good side about being a spendthrift. You know what i mean, 50% of my money is being spent on friends.. LOL. And after listening to this phrase, i realised it doesnt matter.. listen to it! : : :

" If money can bring and buy happiness to a person/ people, then spending that amount of money, no matter how much, it is worth it. "

It may imply to rich people too, the phrase can be changed to, " If money can bring and buy happiness to a person/ people, then it's the first time i feel that being rich is a good thing. " =)

Also, i heard of another phrase, maybe it is used mainly on love relationships, or maybe used to console a person.. " Every light has its own story, which implies to our life too." I just feel this phrase very meaningful, dont ask me why, i just feel so.......

This comes the most meaningful part of this post!
Almost everything that happens relates to a word WAIT. Think about it, which things doesnt concern the word wait. Even buying things, even if you have money, the item you want to buy, might not be available, or no money, still have to earn the money to buy. Same as relationship, wait for the person.. right? haiz.. This part is just so meaningful.............. lots more, lazy to type..
Well, back to my training, drama marathon........ cya

2008-03-26T23:48:00.002+08:00

eh, to that person who tagged.. i guess i know who you are. And i hope that my guess is right. Its ok, and i think that we can and are still good friends. So, not to worry...

Anyway, i just got sting by a spider. What the...
A small spider also want to sting me. If i knew, i should had killed it in the 1st place, instead of letting it go. Now, it repays my kindness by sting-ing me.. how great..

Ehh, i saw alot of meaningful things recently...
I came to realise the importance of money..
yaya, will spend lesser after knowing this fact, but still will take cab...
I came to know of a person, "secret" not to disclose his identity..
He's kind of a very pampered boy when he was young, n after those branded goods.. Though when he's a grown up now, he still, is after those branded goods,and of course the good life he enjoyed before.. And he doesnt like to work, or i would say, never satisfied with his job. Well, ended up in debts n drove a taxi. Couldnt earn much, but nevertheless, he still kind of enjoyed life, n of course proud to be a mercedes taxi driver. I could see that he treasures the taxi alot, maybe it's because its a mercedes, except its a taxi. He said its exclusive... But something happened. He lost the job, the taxi. He's sad, no longer exclusive as it was.
Of course, I did pity him. His family always finding fault with him, his wife etc.. A great guy actually, helpful, very helpful..
What i had learnt is that, although i am not after those branded goods.. like LV, gucci or what. But it seems to me that if i do not start to do some thinking and planning and actions now, i may end up like him..... Also, though this incident, i realised that, you should be contented with what u have, treasure it, but never be contented, continue to move forward... if not, you will be stucked never will u become successful.. i learnt a lot la, lazy to type, anyway, the feelings is something words cannot describe...................................................................

anyway, i made up my mind, going to study Banking and Finance, be a banker in future..
lazy to blog.. but alot of interesting things. so, for now, bye

??

2008-03-10T22:17:00.002+08:00

yes, my mind is full of question marks. There are many things worrying me. And really, alot alot. Well, many may think, i'm a spoilt kid or what, nothing for me to think. But i'm certainly not spared..

I suddenly realised there are more things to learn. Well, recently, i started off with the perfecting english scheme. I started it, mainly because i wanted to improve my english, at the same time prepare for the o level exam ( retaking english ) and also for the overseas university. I realised that the vocabulary of mine is shallow, and i'm going to improve it, over the months before army. I will never forget, the feeling i felt when i first took my o level results that year, i saw a d7 for english. Its a shock that took me a long time to recover.......... n its a very much disgrace for me.. also for my family.. well, i'm guilty.. for letting myself and my family down, the proud and arrogant me, had learnt my lesson.

Anyway, not sure if i'm the one having the problem or just the way i say things sometimes, or..... somehow, some friends seem to lose their cool with me....... well, vice versa. I'm hot tempered too, whatever, i'm learning to control my bad temper. Sorry to those i offended...

Also, i suddenly realised that i'm actually a good-for-nothing..
Somone who do not know anything. Someone who do not have any working experience. Whatmore is, he have no confidence at all. No determination too. N seriously, a spendthrift. Chinese says, " bai jia zi".

Also, over the years of shows, i had learnt that the world is a cruel world, its either u survive or others. To each its own.

Troubles and problems keep coming...... never ending....... I had chose to run from it, whenever possible...... whatever. I'm very vexed and frustrated........

2008-02-29T20:34:00.002+08:00

went to career fair today.. omg.. nothing much..
its more of a studies fair to me.........
anyway, i had decided what i will like to study.
psychology or sociology,
banking and finance,
business administration,
casino management,
tourism management.
well, it's one of them.. if there's a double degree,
i will take.

anyway, went with sherly.
well, her shoe broke again. lol...
3rd time already.. LOL..
i feel guilty, every time we go out,
she kind of spend.. on shoes.
LOL.. anyway, nice dinner.. =X

woohoo

2008-02-27T10:23:00.003+08:00

ok, long time since i last blog...
well, i had a very interesting time..

basically, i went around singapore, eating and tasting good food,
with my family, including my cousin & of course my sister, who was back in singapore.
of course, she's back in australia now..
I had ate many superb food. like the famous chicken rice, pu tong ki,
the famous eating place, sin hoi sai or sin hoi shan... etc........
all i can say is that, very nice food and i enjoyed myself.....

also, of which many people knew about it already,
i failed my driving for the second time.
due to the stupid bus cutting my lane, not braking in time or whatsoever,
well, it may be unlucky for me or what,
but i would not give up.
3rd time, jia you. please let me pass........

den, i went to Shanbei chalet...
every year, we, these group of friends, will open a chalet,
just 2 days, 1 night, to enjoy ourselves, and of course,
to strengthen our friendship..
many said it was fun, yet, a few said that it was boring.
The truth is that, fun or not fun, it is the company that was important...

friends with some of them, for 8 years.
some of them, 6-7 years.
fate brought us together, to become friends.
i really treasure these friendships.
We had been through quite a lot together.
secondary 2 streaming,
secondary 4 o levels,
playing of bball together ever since sec 4,
applying of poly together,
some of us applying the same modules,
meeting up to play mahjong or daidee,
going army medical checkup together,
applying uni together, and of course,
enlisting together with them.
We had come a long way,
and it's never easy to have a super long friendship.
All i hope is that, our friendships will last forever,
if we ever meet with problems, misunderstandings,
please let us be able to overcome it,
to cope with it.

Back then in secondary 3,
was the time i followed them for recess, bball sessions.
It was a great company to be with,
ensuring time pass faster than it seems.
remembering the time, when we play catching during recess,
talking about craps during recess, on the way home etc..
remembering the times, when i supplied comics to all,
to read during class, etc..
really miss the good old times..

well, will upload some photos when i'm free,
most interesting picture will be the bamboo clams...

Happy lunar new year

2008-02-09T12:23:00.000+08:00

wishing all happy lunar new year.
so fast, its the 3rd day of new year.
celebrations were great. i'm lazy to upload pic. =)

eh, i really kind of worried and scared..
time files. it seems that yesterday, i'm just a small boy,
playing with the lego. and now, going 20 this year,
and of course, army in a few months.

what i really want in life.?
i want to have a successful career?
of course, who doesnt.
I do not want to grow up..
certainly not at such a fast pace......
I'm worried, of not being able to cope with the working life,
almost everything. It seems scary............
well, welcome to the real world i guess.......

2008 is a year, that make me think lots of things..
firstly, i'm graduating real soon, plus, army.
And, i'm 20 soon! No more teens.. sad..

well, i guess it's part and pancel of growing up...

2008-01-26T13:54:00.000+08:00

first of all, my life is full of frustration these past few weeks.
n
best still, an injury scare.

whatever...